Ever heard the well-meaning but soul-crushing advice, “You better tone down your dreams, they’re unrealistic"? It's the kind of comment even supportive friends or family might say, and it can make you shrink your personality, limiting your true potential. Let's explore two, simple and effective tips to help you stop minimizing yourself.

What Is Minimizing Yourself?

In psychology, rationalizing your feelings is typically called “minimizing”. It’s can be helpful to recognize ways we may self-minimize so here’s a seven examples:

7 Examples of Self Minimizing Behavior

1. Sitting in the back of the classroom, conference, or meeting in order to avoid being seen or chosen to speak. 
2. Physically trying to make yourself seem small, less large, less tall. 
3. Not speaking up or sharing your thoughts or opinions. 
4. Never asking questions or being curious.
5. Ignoring your emotional, or physical needs.
6. Downplaying your own wants, needs, likes or preferences.
7. Using phrases such as, “Oh, it was nothing”, “It is not a big deal”.

What Is The Opposite Of Self-Minimization? 

The opposite of minimizing is “maximizing”. Also called “catastrophizing” this behavior can be defined by these characteristics:

1. Exaggerating the importance of an event 
2. Imagining the worst possible outcome of an event or activity
3. Overthinking the past or everyday situations 

2 Tips To Stop Minimizing Yourself

Here’s two tips that work for me to stop being so critical of myself:

Tip #1 Journaling

I’ve journaled off and on for many years and always find that writing about the reason I have a particular feeling is like turning on a light bulb in my mind. Everything gets illuminated. Then I can take a closer look at things and work through them. 

Tip #2 Sticking To My Wellness Standards

To be my best self for my family and friends, I prioritize self-care. Putting others first leads to burnout, so I remind myself to focus on my needs and values. My ego may try to keep me safe, but I am in control of my choices. So, I choose to care for wellbeing first in order to be there for others.

Final Thoughts

Never feel pressured to downplay your space in this world. Expressing yourself is what it means to be human. Just as sharing ideas, opinions, or taking action helps communicate your worth.

Yes, it can be an uncomfortable path to becoming your best self. Growth happens in the space of discomfort. In the end, when you stop minimizing who you truly are and start exploring who you want to be, you can live a more authentic and fulfilling life. 

More importantly, when you don’t let others define who you are or what you're capable of, you are well on your path to embracing your uniqueness. Being true to yourself not only creates a more fulfilling lifestyle but also inspires others to do the same. 

Let’s all be our true, authentic selves so we inspire everyone we cross paths with to live their best life.

Xoxo,

Nicole 

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